This is not a political post.  But the above cartoon does represent the following confession.

To the following you will either be willing to “absolve me of my sins”, judge me as intolerant, or empathetically understand while admitting the same tendency in yourself.  Either way here it goes…

I have expectations…almost always…ok always

I honestly hate that I do, and to be fair they are generally fairly broad, (at least I think) but they are there waiting to be stepped over and reacted to

I have them for men, for women, for friends, for The Bridge, for my wife, for my kids…I am an equal opportunity expectations provider

The problem is that when expectations are not met, and especially not met repeatedly, I am prone to developing a cynicism that I have a hard time shaking

Translation: I do not exhibit, extend, or manifest grace to those around me.  I do not love them as myself, I do not show them Jesus.

To be honest, I am torn.  I think we live in an increasingly standard less society.  Tolerance is king.  Knowledge is individual.  Accountability is archaic and judgmental.    I profoundly disagree with all of these trends, and yet I struggle to come to a biblical balance of grace and the kind of love that desires the very best for another and does all in its power to see that come to pass.

I am interested to hear from you…

Do you think having an expectation is a compromise of grace?

Do you think having expectations are valid, and provide accountability?

How do expectations affect your marriage, and your children?

Are expectations good leadership, or unnecessary burdens?

How ought we to interact with one another in the church, with those outside the church, with friends and family in this context?


1 Comment

Filed under Journey

One response to “Expectations

  1. Sue C

    Very challenging post, Tim.

    My personal take on it concerns the motives behind the expectations we have. Expectations based on Biblical vision with the motive of bringing glory to God are much different from expectations based on our own personal vision or desire for our own reputation to be enhanced.

    Are you seeking to be a good father/husband (as evidenced by your expectations of your family) so people will look at you and say, “wow, what a great guy!”… or are you seeking to fulfill the vision of the kind of father/husband that reflects God’s grace and glory to a lost and dying world?

    If we live expectation-less lives, we will end up with very little fruit. But it’s the motive and the vision behind our expectations that derives the eternal fruit… or not.

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